* Please note this post has been updated to remove the links since Sweet Tomato Designs has retired.  🙁

I know I am getting very weary of this work arrangement that we have right now.  Michael leaving every week, coming home every weekend. And as much as I was trying to relax with him home, to relax when the kids started fighting, to relax knowing that in the grand scheme of life this is for a short time, I just can’t.  So instead of being able to relax, I scrapped.  I scrapped about how I’m weary and how I’m tired.  And as I free journaled out what is going on in my head right now, I at least feel more in control.

Sweet Tomato Designs has a new kit out and the colors are very calming.  I love these colors.  The turquoise, browns and ice grey, are like a balm to my troubled soul.  They were urging me to Relax.

And as I was reading through some post that I found off of my Facebook feed, the thought of Jesus saying “Come to ME, all who are weary…” was comforting.  So I scrapped it.

Sometimes the strongest thing about my scrapbook therapy is the fact that life isn’t always pretty.  I don’t always remember to hand everything over to God, I don’t always remember to ask for help when I need it.  At times right now it feels like I’m going it “alone” so often, despite the fact that I have friends who want to help and most importantly a husband who is trying to so hard.  I hate feeling like I’m making him feel sad for what he is not able to do right now.

I have to remember to rely on God, every morning, every moment that I want to throw my hands up and scream, when I want to just close the door, crawl into bed and cry.  And today is one of those days.

This is me today.  Being weary, knowing that I need to relax and spend time with my kids because despite all there is to do, these days will go quickly.  So I will try to remember.

Here is the journaling…

“As a mom, there is never time to truly relax.  This has been ever present in my mind as Michael spends each week working to provide for us, living with his parents, and coming home on weekends.  You’d think that after a while it would become routine, that it would get easier.  But it hasn’t.  Perhaps it is the time of year, the anniversaries that we celebrate.  Perhaps it is the fact we have been sick, that the weather is cold so it is hard to get out of the house.  Whatever it is, it is wearing on me.  I am weary of this arrangement.  It’s not what we want.  It’s what we have to do right now.  So as I feel tugged in multiple directions, by three children here with me, by my grief of the one that is not here, by my jobs that I’m trying to do to bring in a little extra money and my volunteer work that I remain to feel strongly about.  I struggle.  I struggle to remember that God can help me through each day if I only look to him for strength, patience and guidance.  I need to go to him because I am weary, because I am heavy laden.  And even though rest feels like something of the past, I need to take that time with Him in whatever form it takes, so I can handle all that “life” is throwing our way right now as I wait for the job that will enable us to be together again…..”

So I hope you take some time….

Find some time to relax.  Purchase this kit here, and remember even when there isn’t time, sometimes that is just the very time that you need to relax…

With Blessings, Becky